Student examples ENG7

Course introduction: English - a culture creator or a culture killer?

Used with the permission of the creators for educational purposes.

Monroe's Motivated Sequence

Example failed speech

(No title)

Specific purpose: Convince the audience to give money to organizations that fights poverty

General purpose: Poverty and organizations that fights poverty

Introduction

Attention: : 736 million people lives in extreme poverty, surviving on less than 1.90 dollar a day. That’s 10 percent of the world’s population and more than 70 times the population that lives in Sweden. Think about it.

Need: For every ten persons there’s one that won’t be able to get food for the day. This person can’t afford clothes or go to school. Of these 736 million people that lives in poverty 385 million is childrens. People are dying and they need help.

Body

Satisfaction: Poverty is a big problem, but the extreme poverty has decreased. In 1981 there was 1.9 billion people that lived in extreme poverty. There’s some simple steps for action that you can take to be the change that you wish to see in your world. To give money to organizations that fights poverty is the easiest way to make an impact. Today there’s many organizations that works with these questions and the only thing you have to do is donate a little amount of money. Choosing to take action even in the smallest of ways will make a huge impact. By donating money and food to the people that really need it we are taking a step in the right direction to create a poverty-free world

Visualisation: So what would a poverty-free world look like? Well first of all everybody would be able to get food for the day and have somewhere to sleep. Everybody would be able to get education and a job. This is not just good for the individual, when everybody can work and make a living, people can help each other even more for a better future.

Conclusion

Action: You never know when you yourself might be in need one day. Today 736 million people lives in extreme poverty. 736 million too many. 385 million childrens. And we have the chance to be a part of the solution and maybe save a life or two. Take some time and think about this. You can be the difference between a life in poverty or a life that’s worth living for someone.

Example beginner speech

All education should be free

Topic: All education should be free

Specific purpose: (Feke's note: missing)

General purpose: (Feke's note: missing)

Step 1: Attention. Select an Attention-grabber. 264 million children doesn’t have the chance to go to school. Education is a choice for some, while for others, school isn’t an option. Kids all around America can go to school, earn a degree in college, and even get a job. For most kids, education isn’t an option. They can’t go to school due to conflict, disaster, living conditions, and much more. All kids deserve educational opportunities no matter what gender, race, religion, they are. Many students around the country drop of school between the ages of sixteen to twenty four. Nearly 6.2 million students in the U.S. between the ages of 16 and 24 in 2007 dropped out of high school, which is more than 16 percent of all Americans in that age range.. This number is shocking. Who would have thought that 6.2 million kids dropped out of school?

The question is why? Kids drop out of school for many reasons. Some reasons are due to an illness, helping with the family, moving around too much, or they just don't really care. Everyone has a choice. Students don’t make the greatest choices for their education.


Step 2: Need. What is the problem? The problem is that not everyone has the opportunity to go to school for free or attend school at all. Money shouldn’t avoid people to go to school. People should not have to pay for education. If we didn't have education, we wouldn't be expressing our opinions in the first place. If we didn't have education, we wouldn't be able to even read what I just said. Not many people have a successful career in their lives, and if education is not free, they may not have the sufficient funds to help their children go to school. What this would mean is they may not get the skills they need for their future to find a job or even hope. Many people in Africa and other places which does not provide free education as a law, when asked, wished they had education.

Steg 3: Satisfaction. What is the solution? The government should take their responsibility and make education free. Government, business and civil society need to come together in a mature manner, beyond lip-service to deliver concrete and workable solutions to the country’s problems.

Step 4: Visualisation. What will it look like when we have solved the problem? College is a time where kids become adults. They learn what to do in the real world. For some, college is effortless, For others, college is a bumpy road the whole four years. People all around us struggle in something. Imagine if everybody have the opportunity to go at school, more people would be educated and in this way more people would get jobs. In conclusion, all kids deserve educational opportunities, no matter who they are or what they look like. Everyone's the same. Treat them the same. School decides what you are going to do with your life in the future, so that’s why everybody should have free education. If everyone had free education, maybe the world would be a better place.

Step 5: Action. What do we need to do? I'm so thankful that i have the opportunity to go to school everyday and get free food in school everyday. I hope everybody who have the opportunity to go to school for free is thankful for that.

Example intermediate-advanced speech

Just do it! Life's too short to think - just do it

Topic: Just do it! Life's too short to think - just do it.

Specific purpose: Step out of your comfort zone

General purpose: You are going to miss out about all of the good things in life if you don’t take that decision.


Step 1: Attention. Select an Attention-grabber.

I stand here today speaking to you about that life’s too short to think, you should just do it. But truth be told, I’m really bad at “just doing it”. Hopefully I’m going to listen to myself and start doing random things to go out of my comfort zone, to experience more in life and to not think about what everyone are going to think about me. For example, I should have said yes to go with them and to meet new people. I should have said yes to my friend and go to that party and just let everything around me disappear for a while. Even though I say yes to a lot of things, I’m constantly afraid of what people will think of me and that needs to STOP.

Step 2: Need. What is the problem?

The problem is that we never do those things who affect our lives, for example when you ask that really handsome boy or girl out. We are to afraid to stand out. All of us are afraid of doing something that is going to affect people around us. Either to affect their feelings or to change the way they think about you. You are afraid to not be loved. You’re afraid that people are going to talk shit about you. One thing I can tell you is that in your lifetime, people are going to talk shit about you and you are gonna have rough times in your life. Just remember who you are and stand up for yourself. Don’t let them take away your personality, don’t let them push you down, don’t let them think that they are better than you, because NO one will ever be that. We need to feel that rush in our body when we ask someone out. We need to feel that our heart beats so fast that it feels like it’s going to jump out of our body. Everyone needs to be more spontaneous in their lives.

Steg 3: Satisfaction. What is the solution?

We all are in this problem and this problem is bigger than we actually know. Problems are made to go away and this problem needs to go away right now. Therefore we need to stop caring about what people are going to think about us. We need to stop overthinking. The solution of this problem is to be brave. Start with the little things and take one step at a time.

Step 4: Visualisation. What will it look like when we have solved the problem?

When all of us realise that it’s not scary to stand out or to do the things we want to do, we are going to be the best version of our self. I think we are going to be more social in life and I also know that we are going to be happier and spread the big smile in your face over to someone else who is having a rough time. Sometimes you should just do it and think afterwards, or never think;) No matter what you do or who you are, people are always going to talk shit about you. Ignore them, do the things that make you happy and the things who bring out the best of you.

Step 5: Action. What do we need to do?

To summarise, I just want to say that we should encourage each other to step out of the comfort zone. Start saying yes to random things, and the most important one that I’m also going to take with me is to not think what the people around me says.

Ditch the friend who not let you do the things you want. Be yourself and try new things. When you do all of this, I promise you, you’re not going to miss out on the fun things you can do. “Just do it”.

Experiences of The Color Purple

Student example nr 1

The Color Purple is an epistolary novel written by Alice Walker, which introduces the reader to the life of an african-american woman in the southern United States, in the first half of the 1900s. Celie, the main character, is introduced as an dependent woman, miserable with the life she's currently living. On the first page, Celie writes about how her dad ("Pa") rapes her. This book has no filter, its real, raw, naked and emotional from beggining to end, just like real life.


The color purple symbolizes the good things in life, that God creates for the people to enjoy. Both visually, mentally and physically. "I think it pisses God off if you walk by the color purple in a field somewhere and don't notice it.", (p.197) says Shug. In the beginning of the book, Celie has no sense of the color purple, she's just holding on and surviving. Little does she know that it's really everywhere once you acknowledge it.


After a while of writing letters to God, Celie feels like giving up. Experiencing not only racism, but also sexism (two themes of the book) every day is tough and even a strong, hardworking woman like Celie has a breaking point. "Anyhow, I say, the God I been praying and writing to is a man. And act just like all the other mens I know. Trifling, forgitful and lowdown.", "If he ever listened to poor colored women the world would be a different place, I can tell you." (p.193), Celie writes to her sister Nettie. These two quotes quickly describes the way the men in this society acted towards a black woman such as Celie.


As a white woman in modern Sweden, this book makes me realize how priviledged I am. It isn't necessarily impossible to relate to because of mine and the main charcters differences, but it really gives a new perspective to both Celies and your own life. The way the book is written (in letters, almost like a diary) is what makes it so relatable and also the reason why it feels so raw. It's really amazing how Walker has managed to write a book about racism and sexism, and still keep it so accessible to everyone. I think that's what makes it so good, and revolutionary, everyone has something to learn from this book.


When Celie met Shug, things started to change for her. Shug teaches her how to stand up for herself, about God, and the color purple. "God is inside you and inside everybody else. You come into the world with God. But only them that search for it inside find it." (p. 196) says Shug, "I believe God is in everything /.../" (p. 197). Celie listens and her life really changes - making personal growth (and how to get there) the main theme of the book. "I think us here to wonder, myself. To wonder. To ast. And that in wondering bout the big things, you learn about the little ones, almost by accident. But you never know nothing more about the big things than you start out with ." (p. 288).


The turning point of the book was when Celie found out that Albert had been keeping Nettie's letters away from her and, with support from Shug, Celie finally stands up for herself and takes back the control of her own life. From that point on, Celie really started to grow into the independent woman she finally became in the end. The climax was when Celie found out that "Pa" had died and left his house to Nettie and her, which gave them a huge financial freedom and the possibility to finally become completely independent.


In conclusion, The Color Purple is a raw and tough book. A book that everyone, black or white, male or female, young and old, can relate to in some way (it's just about life), and learn something from. Life is tough, so we have to be tougher, because in the end, it will all work out and, if we just acknowledge it, the color purple really is everywhere.


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Some adjectives, chained in pairs

Few examples of fitting vocabulary

Many quotes which are explained


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Repetitive, low variation

Few linking words.

Postcolonial discussion is short.

Student example nr 2

The book color purple introduces the reader to the african american women's struggle for empowerment. The book tells us about how men used their power to control women, and how poor Celie suffer in the hands of men. But throughout the book we learn different characters, different women who also learning how to become stronger and be their own person without men telling them how to be or behave.


The phrase " you better not never tell nobody but God. It'd kill your mommy". Reminds of a lot how men treated women long time ago, where men controlled women and how isolated Celie was, how she was scared to make her voice heard and the only one she could speak/write to was God, no one but only God. It made me think of how she would escape from suffering absuive household and marriage but the more throughout the book the more character development i see from her.


In the novel, the author uses examples of post-colonial theory, such as otherness and eurocentrism. Otherness where one group exclude or margnalize another group. The author brought up racism and internal racism in the book that clearly showed how normalized racism back then was. Example of how much privilage white people had was when Sofia met the mayor's wife that looked at Sofia's children as if they are some exotic objects and then asked Sofia if she wanted to be their maid. Sofia answered them with " hell no" which led to the mayor slap Sofia in the face and Sofia fought back. The problem was that Sofia was the only one put in jail even though the Mayor was in the wrong too. But because of Sofia being black, it's her fault because they see her as an "angry black woman". Another incident in the book that showed clearly of internal racism and also sexism was when people described Shug Avery. They saw her as "slutty" because she wore bright colored dresses and revealing clothes and they also thought of her as too dark which is an insult because where they lived in a eurocentrism country where white people was the ideal beauty and being too dark was "dirty" or being "poor". and because of the eurocentrism perspective was the norm. Or when Nettie tried to make the Olinka tribe christian and learn them in western way even thoug they couldn't care elss which is example of eurocetrism.


This book remind me of how long women have struggle for not only sexism but also racism and for not being the beauty standard. Back in the days when i was younger, bothme, my black friends and asian friends went through racism from both white adults and children. It was normalized as we lived in a city where there was not a lot of colored children. I remember how white people opinion about how i looked as a child affected my view of myself and how i hated being asian.Not only does black women endure racism from white people but also from black men, i don't know how many articles i've read or how many videos i've seen online where black men kill black women or black men humiliate black women online and calls them ugly compared to white women but when they get called out for being racist, they excuses themselves and say it's a prefernce. Calling a black women is like calling their own mother ugly because she is black. Black men are supposed to be by black women sides and not against them. And same goes to white men and women because we all are humans. putting others down doesn't make us to a better person.


The color purple leaves us thinking about sexism, racism and the struggle of african women. I've learned how the colonial of the theme othernes have affected people's view of each other and how much people judge one and another based on their skin color. When i read the book and see the different characters it makes me to think of each women representing each struggle. Celie struggle with abuse and controlled by Mr, Sofia is a strong woman which men fear because she doesn't let them put her down and Shug Avery doesn't care about people telling her how to behave and wear because she does what she wants despite being judge by her skin color and her revealing clothes. These women all devloped to strong characters and show us how to not give up and not letting men telling you how to live.


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Some examples of fitting vocabulary

Good structure with some linking words

Strong discussion related to the issues in the book together with real-life examples


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Grammar mistakes related to genetive case: "Celie suffer" (sufferS)

Occasionally, some sentences lack words

Exampels of Swenglish sentence structures

Learn instead teach

Student example nr 3

With the help of her characters in 'The Color Purple', Alice Walker introduces the reader to relevant and important topics like racism, discrimination and abuse. Celie, the main character, had a rough start in life, the man she thought of as her father was very abusive, both sexually, and physically, throughout her childhood. At a young age Celie is forced to marry a man referred to as Mr.___. Mr.___ is significantly older than Celie and has several devious children from a previous marriage, children that Celie is now expected to care for. Despite all of Celie's horrendous experiences there is one thing she loves in life, her sister Nettie. Celie allows Nettie to escape their abusive childhood home and move in with her and Mr.___. It does not take long however, before Mr.___ evicts his unwanted guest and Nettie is finds herself alone on the streets. Not having heard from her sister in years, Celie assumes that Nettie is dead, until the truth is unraveled when she finds all the letters that Mr.___ has hidden.


Nettie's first letters explain how she met a wonderful family that welcomed her in to their home. The family members, Sam, Corrine and their two adopted children, plan to go on a missionary trip to Africa and invite Nettie to come with them. When they arrive in Africa the inhabitants of the village are baffled, they never thought missionaries could be black. It is very common that white people, especially white women, come to African villages and try to "save" the villagers. This phenomenon is called 'white saviourism' and often does more harm than good. Sending white missionaries to "save" black people states that there is something wrong with the way Africans live. In 'The Color Purple' this becomes apparent on p.155 "The white missionary would not let us have this ceremony, said Joseph." . The cermony is a celebration and appreciation of 'roofleaf', something that is fundamental for building huts that withstand weather. The missionary trip is an example of how the author uses post-colonial theory and addresses issues like eurocentrism and colonial education. Eurocentrism is the belief that european values, like christianity, are the only correct ones, this is the reason christian churches send missionaries to teach the "savage Africans" about religion. Teaching about christian and western beliefs is also an example of colonial education.

Throughout her letters Nettie also describes hierachical structures similar to what Celie experiences in the USA. Nettie writes about the descrimination towards women in the African village, they are supposed to care for the children, cook, clean and work in the field. No girl is allowed education and their only goal should be to find a husband that can provide for them. Similarly, Celie was forced to marry young and is expected to cook, clean, work in a field and care for someone elses children. As the story continues Nettie persuades the fathers to allow their daughtes in to the school and Celie finds the courage to leave Mr.___ and start her own business. Another similarity between Celie's and Nettie's lives is how the white people abuse their power. White people come to the African village and decide to turn it into a plantage for rubber trees, they destroy the roofleaf and force the villagers to move. The villagers are forced to pay rent for their own land and to buy tin from the colonizers for their buildings. In Celie's story there are many examples of white people abusing their power. A prominent one being when the mayor and his wife ensure that Celie's friend Sophia is imprisoned for being sassy towards the mayor's wife.


Parts of the story remind me of my own life. A quote that stuck with me was "All her young life she has tried to please her father, never quite realising that, as a girl she never could." from p. 166. I feel a connection with that young girl because I myself recently realised that there are relatives that I will never please, no matter what I do, simply because I am not a boy. More importantly I also realised how privileged I am as a white person in today's world. All the systemic racism, dicrimination and police brutality does not affect me to the extent it affects black people.


Most authors would shy away from writing such a personal, emotional and powerful book because it is so easily ruined by a single misstep. Alice Walker however, gracefully takes on the task and writes a marvellous story so unbelievably detailed it leaves every reader feeling as though it might as well have happened directly to them. The uneasiness felt as a white person is closely related to a newfound distrust and criticism towards our fundamental social structures.


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Fitting vocabulary connected relevant themes, adjectives to explain these

Great structure using linking words, both externally and internally

Several examples of postcolonial theory along with examples from The Color Purple


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One minor grammatical mistake

The Power of Language

A Warning to the Future

Yet to be included.

Common European Framework of Reference for Languages

The Common European Framework of Reference for Languages is a "transparent, coherent and comprehensive reference instrument" by the Council of Europe (retrieved 2019-07-05). The course English 7 is aligned with B2.2, in the highger levels is B2 and lower ends of C1. Please use the chart below as a reference.